nothing to gain but everything to lose

My mother asked me if i wanted pizza about half an hour ago, i told her i would rather save the money. thinking that she might actually consider saving money for once, i performed a grand escapade from my room to the kitchen in a desperate attempt to make a "savings jar". i crafted said jar from a empty peanut butter container and one of my cheap locks that cost around $1. i also got a small blue storage container and put it on the counter before proceeding to pillage my room/apartment for any form of currency. i gathered a a fair sized loot and began to deposit all of the pennies into the storage container and everything else into the "savings jar". about half way through my attempt at being an accountant my mother made a call to the beer man. she had ordered around $20 worth of beer and a tad extra for delivery/tip. disappointed and feeling the sting of defeats blade, i went captured by gloom back to my lonely living quarters. after sitting and pondering about how i could get a job and save more than a few coins my mom went to the door to get the beer and returned calling for me. after about ten seconds of what seemed like me doing nothing i opened my door and replied "yes?". she came forth and said that the man was wearing Axe "Kilo" body spray and that she agreed when he told her it was the best type. only once before have i felt such disgust for myself as i stood there, feeling like an empty shell in a full world. if you were to look into my eyes at this point you would probably see someone who had nothing left to live for. i shall end this in saying that im not normally like that. i tend to cover up my unique pain with an even more unique sense of humor, laughter or pure stupidity.